It’s true, you can. So and so said that in a recent episode
of Bones. ;)
About a month after our perfect wedding, I woke up one
morning still thinking about the dream I’d just experienced. In my dream I was
holding a beautiful baby girl and dream-me loved her so much. When I woke up it
stung. My arms felt empty. I told JJ and he was all “really…” with his
“woohoo!!!! she’s baby hungry!” face.
It wasn’t a prophecy, nor was it a premonition or a sign
from God. It was just a dream. Having that dream just changed me is all—it
changed my mind.
So our little baby is due October 13, 2013.
We always refer to “it” as “she” because we are very
optimistic about this.
(Though there is room in our hearts for a little baby boy
too… I don’t know nothin’ bout boys.)
Oh yeah, there is definitely only one baby in there.
(Thank the stinkin’ stars!!)
I’m feeling 1,011 different emotions at any given moment of
any given day. They are these: Amazed, ecstatic, wonder, excitement, worry,
sheepish(honeymoon baby… ;), inadequate, young, unprepared, ignorant, and
straight-up-hair-raising-fear. The other thousand emotions are
indescribable—there are not words for those but they are real.
I. Read. Too. Much.
Every time I read about a birth defect, labor complications, or any of the
what-could-go-wrongs—I shake. It’s not a “Can someone close that window?”
shake. It’s a scared-to-death kind of shake. I have a complex where I NEED to
know what is going to happen and when it is going to happen. Surprises are not
okay. They’re just not. Is there a phobia for that? I just pray, and pray, and
pray some more that I can have a healthy baby. I will love an imperfect baby
too. I just want him/her to be okay. Though “okay” is slightly ambiguous.
All of my friends who are having babies are all “look at
this miracle!” and “I can not wait!” and “look how yummy this food is.” While
I’m all “food is death.” and “Please stay in there until I know how to be a
mom.” and “what on this pretty earth is a…” :)
I’m not pessimistic and worrisome about everything. This
little baby is going to be well loved. JJ and I have a lot of love to give.
Baby is going to be showered with books. We will read to him/her at every
possible moment—what a lucky baby in my book. ;)
I can already smell baby’s head. You know that smell, don’t
you? I can also already feel baby’s soft skin, and round belly. I hope baby has
JJ’s dimples—they’re breath stopping. I want to hear the little giggles. I
cannot contain myself; I need to hold this baby!
In JJ's words.
Our testimony of families.
All in all, we can say with absolute certainty that this won't be easy. We're not all that simple-minded. We are going to enjoy every single growing experience we can get out of this--because it is a gift from our Father in heaven. We are grateful that we will get to be stewards over one of His spirit children and for the opportunity we have to be a part of His most important plan--the family. We have firm and unshakeable testimonies that families are of God. Not only are they of Him, but they are central to His plan for each of us. When our little one comes, we find comfort in knowing that we will all get to be together for an eternity of progressing and perfecting.
To know more about families:
http://mormon.org/family
In JJ's words.
Close to a couple of months after getting married to the
most amazing girl ever, we received some life changing news. It started with Nichole telling me about a
dream she had of us having a little girl.
I liked the sound of it, I couldn’t help but picture how cute the kid
would be considering how pretty her mom is!
A couple of weeks later we noticed Nichole wasn’t feeling very good.
With that and some other signs, we decided to check it out. Sure enough, she was pregnant! That was exciting news that I was ecstatic
about.
This last month and a half has been a lot of adjustment
making for Nichole and I. With me
changing my major from Computer Engineering to pre-law; Nichole fighting with pregnancy sickness, us
trying to plan for our child, and on top of all that Nichole and I trying to
keep her pregnancy on the down low for the first little while--it has been
fun. While it’s been an interesting ride
so far, it’s also been exciting. I can’t
wait for October 13th!
Our testimony of families.
All in all, we can say with absolute certainty that this won't be easy. We're not all that simple-minded. We are going to enjoy every single growing experience we can get out of this--because it is a gift from our Father in heaven. We are grateful that we will get to be stewards over one of His spirit children and for the opportunity we have to be a part of His most important plan--the family. We have firm and unshakeable testimonies that families are of God. Not only are they of Him, but they are central to His plan for each of us. When our little one comes, we find comfort in knowing that we will all get to be together for an eternity of progressing and perfecting.
To know more about families:
http://mormon.org/family
Holy crap that's awesome!!! Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteOh and p.s. I completely relate to you on the read-too-much thing. I was the worst during the first half and I worried so so so much and I still have my moments. By the third trimester though, you get too exhausted to worry. At least that's how it was for me! :) Good luck!
ReplyDeleteYou are going to be the best mom ever. And, JJ is going to be a great dad. And, of coarse, we all know I am the best Grand dad. So, this kid is already lucky, loved, and waitin to be spoiled.
ReplyDelete